Imagine you’re sitting in a crowded coffee shop. Your leg bounces nervously under the table as you struggle to stay calm. You’re on a date with someone you just met a week ago and everything is going wrong.
The espresso machine hisses loudly behind you as the barista yells, “Large latte for Cheryl. Latte for Cheryl! Cheryl!”
Conversations from nearby tables blend together as the overhead lights somehow burn brighter by the minute and the tag on the shirt you’re wearing is digging into your ribs like a dagger.
Your date is talking rapidly about a new project they’re managing at work; often using corporate jargon you don’t quite understand. When he asks, “Enough about me, what about you?” You freeze. Is he asking what you do for a living? Or more generally about you? Who you are? What you like? The pause stretches uncomfortably long. You finally mumble something about what you do for work. Then quickly change the subject and watch his face transform from confusion to boredom as you rattle on about what you’re planning no planting in your garden this year.
Later, you’ll replay this conversation in your head dozens of times, trying to figure out where it went wrong.
When you’re neurodiverse, it can feel like you’re constantly guessing (and second guessing) how to communicate without coming across as weird or anxious or incoherently wordy.
In order to navigate these communication challenges, I’m going to help you understand how your brain works differently and learn how to work with your brain instead of fighting against it.
“Fixing” your brain or trying to make you think or act more like a neurotypical person isn’t what we’re after. Learning how to manage these situations with your unique differences in mind is.
So let’s try some practical tools to help you maneuver through some of the more prickly communication scenarios you may come across.
[Read more…] about Rewiring Connection: 5 Transformative Solutions for Neurodiverse Communication Challenges